Mood: so depressed
Listening to: Nothing to Lose- Billy Talent

The day just goes by and I sit here thinking about my life and what I did and what went wrong. I think about the things I said and why I acted the way I did. I sit there and ask myself at night when i'm all alone and bleeding "Was today lived to its fullest?" Then I answer that question with another slash. My wrist is trashed but I don't care. I love how the wounds represent my life and how tattered and torn my life is. My soul is being pulled into so many directions and my heart and is being broken into millions of pieces. All of the hate is building inside me but I feel no other release but hurting myself. This is my release and it feels like nothing else in this world. Knowing that I'm in control with the blade in my hand resting on my wrist. The blood is my life flow. Have you ever tasted the life flow? That taste is the bitter sweetness of what my life is made of. The taste of life flow gives me the rush I need to feel alive.

^ random thing that I thought while being depressed.. No wrists were slashed in the making of this writing thinger.

But ya as my journal says I am severely depressed and I just don't give a fuck. Things will perk up again only to crash me hard on my face again when I am least expecting it. But thats the way life goes eh?

Tomorrow I am going to a funeral for a guy that died at my school. I am going out of respect and so I can be there for my friends even though I did not know him well. People shouldn't worry about me so much. It is the people that you least expect to do that do. I'll be fine here even though my heart is broken, from the words that have been spoken. I will hold on no matter how far gone I seem to be.